Wonderful One

One of the questions you may be asking is, “How do I know when to seek help and what kind of treatment for anorexia our family needs?” If inpatient treatment is not necessary, then your options are home based treatment (where you are in control of your daughter’s food intake with little to no outside help), working in conjunction with a team of professionals (therapist, nutritionist and physician), or a combination of the two.

Some parents have success using home based treatment alone. Others may not be able to do this for a variety of reasons and will need a team of professionals involved. Many will need both.

When exploring what anorexia treatment is best for your family, here are six things to consider:

If you have concerns about your son or daughter’s eating behaviors, pay attention and don’t assume it is just a phase. The longer the eating disorder thinking is allowed to fester in your daughter’s mind, the more difficult it will be to help her get out of it. The wisest thing to do if you are concerned is to have her professionally evaluated. That said; let’s look at some other variables to consider.

You get to think through what you want to say and say it well, because in the writing process you can edit. Once you feel you have communicated it the best you can, you can give it to her. You can even ask a close friend, counselor, or pastor to read it and give you feedback. This will help ensure you are expressing yourself in the way you intend.

The second thing that happened is the mother and oldest teenage daughter developed a special bond following dad’s death. A couple years later mom met a man and remarried, and the oldest daughter felt abandoned and a deep sense of loss. She lost her dad, her mom during her dad’s illness, got her mom back after he died and now lost her again to another husband. Within a few months of her mother’s remarriage, they were in my office because the daughter refused to eat and was losing weight.

Let’s look objectively at this. Is it the parent’s fault their daughter developed an eating disorder? No. Were their things that occurred in the family that contributed to the development of an eating disorder? You decide. This family did the best they could to cope with a devastating illness and traumatic loss. They did not see the soil ripening for an eating disorder to develop and what family would?.

When you write out your concerns, your daughter has to involve her rational mind as she reads it. She is no longer only in emotional mind which is where she is camped out during face to face conversations. You want to do as much as possible to engage her rational mind and writing back and forth accomplishes this.

The most important variable in evaluating when to seek help and your family’s needs is not the age of your child, but her openness to help and her response to your guidance and limit setting regarding food. If she is unwilling to abide by the limits you set around food, consult a professional therapist with eating disorder experience. I cannot stress it enough; if she resists guidance from you, seek help now.

Resource Author Francisco Rodriguez Higueras
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